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Nils von Kalm's take on faith, life, and how it all might fit together

Archive for the 'Ego' Category

Sermon – The Ultimate Power Grab

Posted by soulthoughts on 20th October 2009

Last Sunday I preached on the outrageous request of James and John in Mark 10:35-45. This is a passage that has enormous relevance for our society today as we are constantly told to strive to be number one. But does Jesus condemn this?

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Marching on our knees

Posted by soulthoughts on 20th June 2009

I always remember a sermon given by John Smith in the early 1990s in which he talked about the essence of the Christian faith. In decrying the attitude of the strutting, egoistic rock star, he made a comment that has stuck with me. He said that Christianity doesn’t strut – it marches on its knees.

Photo by Leonardo FalaschiniThe journey of following Jesus is completely counter to the culture in which we find ourselves today. In a world where we are told to look out for number one, Jesus says ‘surrender’. The call of Jesus is to run up the white flag. Many misunderstand that command as a call to weakness and letting yourself be walked all over. But it is far from that. It is a walk of humility, a walk, which I have said elsewhere, is nothing less than a facing of reality.

At church a few weeks ago, the song leader invited us to kneel for a song which spoke of surrender. So most of us knelt down as we sang the next song. This simple action changed my whole attitude in the singing of that song. All of a sudden I was in an attitude of genuine worship. For the first time in many many years, I sang with my hands open and my eyes closed. In that place I was no longer just singing, I was praising, lifting God up. And I was offering myself back to God to do with me as He wills. Kneeling during that song helped me to have an attitude of submission to my God. It also made me see how much I demand my own way – how unsurrendered I am most of the time. It was a real eye-opener and something for which I am thankful.

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Gifts, motives & ego

Posted by soulthoughts on 7th May 2009

A million young poets screaming out their words, to a world full of people just living to be heard…maybe some day those words will be heard.

These words of John Mellencamp from his classic Lonesome Jubilee album are the cry of a generation of bloggers, twitters and citizen journalists. Everyone wants everyone to read their piece, their opinion, their take on the world. And the best way to do this is to promote yourself to get the most readers possible. It’s a ‘look at me…pleeease!’ world, and we all fall for it. Insecurity abounds as we clamour over each other for the affection of the masses.

Mark Sayers has written a post about his self-promotion conundrum. I too struggle with this tempation. I struggle with the fantasy of having millions reading this website and marveling at what a brilliant writer I am. My ego gets in the way of a simple desire to communicate what I think is some life to a world that is dying.

But then I look at the Gospels, and I see that Jesus never promoted himself. He never said “I’m preaching at the temple tonight. Come along and hear me”. People came to him. The common people heard him gladly. As one of the characters in Ben Hur said, “He speaks words of life”.

Jesus’ motive was always to do what was right. My pastor has said that we have nothing we have not been given. Everyone has a gift. We are all equal. What we have are gifts that have been given to us. So no one is better than anyone else. That means my gift is not to be used for my ego, as if it is something I have developed from scratch all by myself. It is a gift. I have done nothing to earn it. It has been given to me by God to be used for God.

Therefore, if it is a gift, I need to use it, to consider it a ministry. In my case, I feel strongly that the world needs to know the true message of Jesus. This website is a humble attempt to do this. But I need to constantly examine my motives. If I am doing this for my own ego I may as well stop now, but if I am doing it for the kingdom, then it is life-giving.

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